Episode 33: Your Goals Need You Rested with Bernadette Joy

[00:00:06] Hi, how are you? I am grateful. I'm so grateful. So this is episode 29. I wish it was 30. I'll do 30 next. So, I couldn't find in my notes, but I have this vague memory that you recorded 30 podcast interviews at last FinCon. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, thank you. Thank you. So, this is the legend who has inspired me to run around like

[00:00:30] a madman for the past two days recording a bunch of podcast episodes. And I was in Botswana two weeks ago. No way. And I was reviewing my notes from last FinCon. And I was like, she did that 30. I'm going to do more. And then I was like, no, you're not. Don't be the one-upping white guy. Just like honor what she did and see if I can get there, right? So, wow. Thank you for inspiring me. So this is number 29? This is 29. Thank you for coming through. You've inspired me.

[00:01:00] All the FinCons I've been to. I think you did the new members, whatever on the first one. So, but here's what I want to say. So, when you speak, you give me like this. Do you mind? I mean, AJ, take a photo so I can send it to you. Thank you. Yeah. Thank you. You're so kind. So, when you speak, you give me this like ice cold challenge feeling of like, you can do it and you're going to do it. But also like this, this warm approachable.

[00:01:29] Well, she did it. So, then it can be done. So, why don't I go do it too? Makes me happy. How do you, that makes me happy. How do you get both accomplished of those seemingly almost contradictory things when you speak or when you write? Oh, that, you know what? That is a great question. No one's ever asked me that before. I will say, I would like to say that when people meet me, hopefully they understand the

[00:01:56] intention behind it. Meaning that people who know me well know that if I'm pushing you to do something, it's because I know that it's possible for you. I don't push people to do things that I don't think is reasonable for them. Sure. So, sometimes I'm often surprised when people say, oh, that sounds really hard or challenging. I'm like, but you've done harder things. So, what are we talking about here? So, the fact that you are running around like a madman doing 30 podcast interviews when a lot of other people are coming in and saying, oh, I'm just here to absorb or learn or whatever, which

[00:02:25] is a great goal also. But say, okay, like, had you, for example, like you've quote unquote failed at this and only did 10, only quote unquote, only 15, that's still better. Sure. That's right. So, I try to push people kind of like beyond that boundary because the worst case scenario is you'll still be better off than when you started. So, that's awesome. Yeah. That's awesome. Okay. So, did you speak at ROI? I did. Okay. How did that go for you?

[00:02:50] It was super fun. I was one of the only people that was there that's kind of like talking more about pure personal finance versus like business. And so, it was really exciting for me to speak there because there's a lot of people there that I also admire. And so, I got a little bit of imposter syndrome myself. I'm like, why am I on stage? Yeah, I really did. I was like, why am I on stage here? These people are like really big and cool. And so, selfishly,

[00:03:19] that was a nice little confidence booster for me. But also, I realized more and more that a lot of us are challenged with a very similar thing. Even the people who are making, who we think are super successful, whatever, we're all just humans trying to get to the next day. So, that was also very grounding. So, that's my favorite conference. I was at the first two. And at the first one, like I made a lot of friends and they're like, you're going to be speaking on the stage. And the next one, I was like, not my stage. Thank you. And they're like, yeah, yeah,

[00:03:46] you will be. And then I was at the second one. I wanted to be there at this last one, but I was scheduled to go in January once it got postponed. And I already had planned for a year and a half, just walk across Africa. So, I was like, well, I'm not going to stop two weeks in and go to the conference even though I'll miss it. But I want to know. So, yeah, I'm walking across Africa. We started June 3rd. I got injured on June 4th. That ended

[00:04:14] up being a great thing because the guy hired to drive for me. He, he, uh, y'all can't see my face, but I just did a big open mouth emoji face. Like, oh my God. Yeah. No, it was a great thing because the guy hired to drive for me. He started walking for me and I drove for him. It took me, it took me so long to heal up because I needed to get that. We weren't trading back and we needed a team walk. So, now we like do a relay where we're doing like, we both drive and walk several times a day and we switch out

[00:04:42] doing this to raise awareness for, uh, water access and funding. That's my life purpose. And so what, what one principle or tip do me and evens need to be keeping on our mind over the next year and a half as we walk the continent and set up water teams? Oh my gosh. Um, first of all, that is amazing. Congratulations. Thank you for sharing that resilience as well. Um, this, this probably sounds obvious, but it's something I still have struggled with is I tend to be also

[00:05:10] sometimes the person that wants to like one up or, you know, do the thing on my own versus doing the team thing. And, uh, the one tip I would say is like, you need to build it rest like that to be a very intentional part, especially if you're doing a big mission like that to step away from, from it, whether it's like every couple of weeks or, you know, even a couple hours a day or whatever it is. I see so many people like you who are like, I'm going to do 30 interviews or whatever.

[00:05:37] I'm going to run like a madman. And then I know, I don't know if that's true for you, but then I'm like, Oh, I did that. And I feel that, that high of it. And so I keep going. That's right. And then I crash. And then you crash or you get injured. Yeah. Right. And then you feel really upset about all this wasn't supposed to happen because I had all these things versus saying maybe the universe is, is forcing me to rest. That's right. I've, I've, I've had similar situations. A lot of my clients where they have these big goals and then something happened, they get injured, like something happens or whatever. And it's like,

[00:06:04] you know, it's because you, you, you didn't, you didn't, uh, build in the rest of yourself. So the universe is going to make you do it. So looking at the, you did the great thing, which was like, Hey, now I need to make this a team effort and all of that stuff. Like, I really hope that people hear me on this because I get challenged with this. So, um, I did a really hard thing for myself. Um, last week I told my, all my clients, I'm going on a nine day hiatus so that I could take a rest. Cause I've been going at this for since 2020 with no

[00:06:32] breaks. Wow. So this is my little, my little message to myself of like, take your own advice, spread it out. Yeah. So the main points that we speak, we're speaking into a mirror, right? That's what I'm finding. Cause I'm always on evens like, Oh, we got to have good posture and we can't litter. And like, how are we going to be helping people if we're not putting our best foot? And I'm like, even I'm all over you, but I'm talking to myself. So thank you. I will, I accept that. And I will, I will build in the rest and I need it. It has to be on the calendar.

[00:07:01] Like you literally have to block out the time, not just say, I'm going to rest today. You actually have to block it just like you schedule any other appointment. Okay. I'll do it. Sundays. I think I'd probably need to, we probably need a little more than that. Sounds like you need at least a midweek one too. That's ambitious what you're telling me to do. So, you know, Sundays, just, just Sundays, like seems like take a little bit more. Okay. So you can do longer. I'll do it. Thank you. This is, this is Bernadette Joy as in the

[00:07:29] Bernadette Joy. Trust your money goals. Be like queen of FinCon and anywhere else. She goes, how can we connect with and support you? Well, thank you so much. You just, y'all can't see me. I'm like about to tear up. That was the sweetest thing you've said. I am at crush your money goals.com. I have a, if you go there, there's a free guide. If you want to get started with us. And then I'm on all social media at Bernadette joy spelled with the word debt. And if you want to support the mission as well,

[00:07:55] we have our book out right now called crush your money goals. You can find it wherever books are sold. It's on audio book and it's at your local library. Crush your money goals. That was a command. Thank you, Bernadette. What I want you to do with this episode is build in the rest, take care of yourself. You're part of the mission too. Subscribe to the newsletter, check out Bernadette joy, and most of all, get your life on your terms. Yeah.